Mother Teresa vs Sigmund Freud - Epic Rap Battles of History.mp3

[00:00.000] 作词 : Nice Peter/Cara Francis/EpicLLOYD/Lloyd Ahlquist/Peter Shukoff/Zach Sherwin/Rich Baker/Robyn Norris/Chris Turner
[00:01.000] 作曲 : Cara Francis/Lloyd Ahlquist/Peter Shukoff/Zach Sherwin/Rich Baker/Robyn Norris/Chris Turner
[00:02.538]EPIC RAP BATTLES OF HISTORY!
[00:05.272]MOTHER TERESA!
[00:07.584]VERSUS!
[00:08.729]SIGMUND FREUD!
[00:10.895]BEGIN!
[00:11.216]Mother Teresa, for short, call me “M.T.”
[00:13.213]I’m a missionary of charity M.C
[00:15.337]Three stripes like Adidas, and I’m doing it for Jesus
[00:18.042]A one woman nun-DMC
[00:20.243]I got a peace prize, but I’m not friendly
[00:22.288]You’re oh-for-thirteen as a nominee
[00:24.407]I’ve got lines like the DMV
[00:25.931]And being me takes balls, but I ain’t got no D envy!
[00:28.883]Who could ask for a better adversary on the mic
[00:31.056]Than the father of psychoanalysis? (Psych!)
[00:33.547]Look at that egghead! Mama wants some omelettes
[00:35.706]I’m here to crack the mind behind the mom-sex complex
[00:37.905]I gave food, bed, medicine, and showers
[00:40.021]To those whose flesh leprosy had devoured
[00:42.236]Your legacy is people who are mad at their parents
[00:44.452]Complaining on the couch for two hundred bucks an hour!
[00:46.774]Jokes I can make about your looks: abundant.
[00:49.304]Your chastity vow: redundant.
[00:51.357]But that's enough about Mary B.
[00:53.262]Let's turn to my favorite subject: me!
[00:55.500]I got mouth cancer, wasn't feeling so hot,
[00:57.604]Had the Doc put me down with a morphine shot.
[00:59.971]Thank imaginary God I wasn't in one of your beds,
[01:02.196]You'd have just sprinkled magic water on my forehead!
[01:04.553]I help people live, you watch people die
[01:07.138]To get souls for a man in the sky!
[01:09.209]You took credit that you didn't deserve,
[01:11.062]You're the fakest sister act since Whoopi Goldberg!
[01:13.323]You were running Project Pimp the Projects,
[01:15.508]To you, Calcutta meant Cal-cutta check!
[01:17.792]I can see right through you and you've got no flavor,
[01:20.007]I'm battling a communion wafer!
[01:22.405]You call that a verse? You're super-ego tripping!
[01:24.319]I gotta say, Sigmund, you're Freudian slipping!
[01:26.483]I built mad missions in my savior's name,
[01:28.665]All you built was a mad tolerance for cocaine!
[01:31.073]Obsessed with masturbation, but you're off the beat!
[01:33.169]Your flows are so poor, I should be washing their feet!
[01:35.618]Dreams are the only place you'll ever be as dope as me!
[01:37.757]I make my rhymes count like beads on a rosary!
[01:40.078]Everything is sex to you! After I'm through wrecking you,
[01:42.702]I'll have to go and do confession just for standing next to you!
[01:44.622]You want a second coming? I'll bess the mic again! (Ooh!)
[01:46.674]I'll end you like a prayer, motherlover! Amen!
[01:49.335]I notice that you talk a lot about yourself, which is funny
[01:52.902]Since you hide your true feelings like they were other people's money.
[01:57.385](Ooh!) An exception to my theory! I can't believe this!
[01:59.999]Here we have a Mother that no one wants to sleep with!
[02:02.252]You had a nice message, but your methods were detestable!
[02:04.440]I've seen better care given to organic vegetables!
[02:06.666]All these tokens and smoke and miracles,
[02:08.968]You really believe all this stuff? You're hysterical!
[02:11.339]I've got the libido to continue to beat ya,
[02:13.367]But our time is up, Teresa.