Making Things Up Again - Musical Mania.mp3

[00:01.050]ELDER CUNNINGHAM: And lo, the lord said into the Nephites,
[00:05.672]"I know you're really depressed, what with all your... AIDS and everything...
[00:12.007]but there's an answer in Christ."
[00:16.225]NABULUNGI: You see? This book can help us!
[00:20.724]ELDER CUNNINGHAM: I just told a lie.
[00:24.300]No, wait. I didn't lie. I just use my imagination.
[00:31.672]And it worked!
[00:33.747]CUNNINGHAMS FATHER: You're making things up again,Arnold.
[00:36.006]ELDER CUNNINGHAM: But it worked, dad!
[00:37.051]CUNNINGHAMS FATHER: You're streching the truth again and you know it-
[00:40.322]JOSEPH SMITH: Don't be a Fibbing Fran, Arnold.
[00:42.587]ELDER CUNNINGHAM: Joseph Smith?
[00:43.746]SMITH AND FATHER: Because a lie is a lie!
[00:45.645]ELDER CUNNINGHAM: It's not a lie!
[00:46.957]MORONI, MORMON, SMITH, and FATHER: You're making things up again, Arnold.
[00:49.147]ELDER CUNNINGHAM: Oh, conscience!
[00:50.333]MORONI, MORMON, SMITH, and FATHER: You're taking the holy word and adding fiction.
[00:53.340]Be careful how you proceed, Arnold.
[00:56.134]When you fib, there's a price.
[01:00.429]MIDDALA: Nah, this is bullshit!
[01:02.765]The story I've been told is that the way to cure AIDS is by sleeping with a virgin.
[01:08.200]I'm going to go and rape a baby.
[01:10.687]ELDER CUNNINGHAM: What?! Oh my-NO! YOU CAN'T DO THAT! NO!
[01:13.599]MIDDALA: Why not?
[01:14.430]ELDER CUNNINGHAM: Because that is definitely against God's will!
[01:16.738]MIDDALA: Says who?
[01:17.900]Where in that book of yours does it say anything about sleeping with a baby? Huh?
[01:23.019]Nowhere!
[01:26.182]ELDER CUNNINGHAM: Uh...Behold!
[01:27.737]The lord said to the Mormon prephet Joseph Smith,
[01:30.037]"You Shall NOT have sex with that infant!"
[01:34.331]Lo! Joseph said,"Why not, Lord? Huh? Why not?"
[01:39.105]The Lord said,
[01:40.000]"If you lay with that infant, you shall... burn in the fiery pits of Modor!"
[01:49.921]MIDDALA: Really?
[01:51.474]ELDER CUNNINGHAM: Uh-huh. Uh-huh."A baby cannot cure your illness, Joseph Smith.
[01:58.328]I shall give onto you... a... a frog!"
[02:02.069]And thus, Joseph laid with that frog and his AIDS was no more!
[02:07.940]MORONI, MORMON, SMITH, and DAD: You're making things up again,Arnold.
[02:10.956]You're recklessly warping the words of Jesus.
[02:14.214]HOBBITS: You can't just say what you want, Arnold.
[02:16.340]ELDER CUNNINGHAM: C' mon Hobbits!
[02:17.567]ALL: You're digging yourself a deep hole.
[02:20.429]ELDER CUNNINGHAM: I'm making things up again, kind of.
[02:23.604]But this time it's helping a dozen people!
[02:27.140]There's nothing so bad because this time,
[02:29.730]I'm not committing a sin just by making up again, right?
[02:33.880]ALL: NO!
[02:34.670]NABULUNGI: Elder Cunningham, you have to stop him!
[02:36.702]ELDER CUNNINGHAM: What? What it is?
[02:37.420]NABULUNGI: Gotswana is going to cut off his daughter's p***y!
[02:40.477]ELDER CUNNINGHAM: Huh???
[02:41.144]GOTSWANA: This is all very interesting.
[02:42.811]But the women have to be circumcised if what the general wants.
[02:46.330]ELDER CUNNINGHAM: No, no, doing that to a lady is definitely against Christ's will!
[02:49.757]GOTSWANA: How do you know? Christ never say nothing about no p***y!
[02:53.482]ELDER CUNNINGHAM: Yes, yes he did!
[02:58.600]In ancient New York, three men were about to cut off a Mormon woman's p***y.
[03:03.370]But right before they did, Jesus had... Boba Fett turn them into frogs!
[03:09.619]GOTSWANA: Frogs?
[03:11.341]ASMERET: You mean like the frogs that got ****ed by Joseph Smith?
[03:14.873]ELDER CUNNINGHAM: Right! Right! Like those frogs!
[03:20.000]For the p***y is the holy amongst all things, said he!
[03:24.297]MORONI, MORMON, SMITH, DAD, and HOBBITS: You're making things up again, Arnold.
[03:26.945](UGANDANS: We're learning the truth!)
[03:27.740]CHORUS: You're taking the holy word and adding fiction.
[03:30.441](UGANDANS: The truth about God!)
[03:31.176]CHORUS: Be careful how you proceed, Arnold.
[03:33.066](UGANDANS: We're going to paradise.)
[03:34.327]CHORUS: When you fib there's a price.
[03:37.405]ELDER CUNNINGHAM: Who would have thought I had this magic touch?
[03:40.520]Who'd believe I could man up this much?
[03:43.756]I'm talking, they're listening.
[03:45.081]My stories are glistening.
[03:46.858]I'm gonna save them all with this stuff.
[03:50.287]You're making things up again, Arnold.
[03:52.705](UGANDANS: Elder prophet man!)
[03:54.000]You're making things up again, Arnold.
[03:55.949](UGANDANS: Holy prophet man!)
[03:57.085]You're making things up again, Arnold.
[03:59.277](UGANDANS: Our savior!)
[04:00.320]ELDER CUNNINGHAM: You're making things up again...
[04:02.738]MASTER YODA: Hmmm, up again making things you are-
[04:06.218]ELDER CUNNINGHAM:... Arnold!