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IRONIC - Bo Burnham.mp3

IRONIC - Bo Burnham.mp3
IRONIC - Bo Burnham
[00:00.32]I believe in th...
[00:00.32]I believe in the zodiac
[00:01.46]Yeah, I do. I'm a leo. I loved Titanic
[00:03.66]Uhh, this is something a little bit more
[00:06.14]Something a little bit morbidly ironic
[00:07.99]My grandmother, uh, she was a cancer
[00:10.76]And she was actually killed by a giant crab
[00:15.16]
[00:19.96]This is a song about the idea of irony, so Strap in.
[00:25.26]My dog's stomach was very upset
[00:27.26]So I put him in the car and we went to the vet
[00:29.68]And on our way to the vet, I killed a cat
[00:33.99]Yeah, I said isn't it that ironic?
[00:37.84]I adopted a child from overseas
[00:40.45]To rescue him from child labor factories
[00:43.05]And on his very first birthday
[00:45.11]We went to Build-A-Bear Workshop
[00:47.45]
[00:50.91]Isn't that ironic?
[00:52.96]Isn't that I-R-O-N-I-C-I-N-O-R-I-R-O-N-I-C
[00:57.12]A waterpark is burned to the ground
[00:59.67]And a tow truck has broken down
[01:02.08]I always used to cry when I laughed
[01:04.93]And then I was raped by a clown
[01:07.63]
[01:17.84]I was watching Al Gore on CNN
[01:20.57]He was talking and talking and talking, and then
[01:23.28]Out of boredom
[01:24.65]My pet polar bear shot himself
[01:31.88]I dated an animal rights activist
[01:33.84]One day she got really pissed
[01:36.55]Because I was eating veal
[01:38.76]That was wrapped in PETA bread
[01:40.95]Get it? Because pita... f**k it
[01:42.94]
[01:44.00]I-R-O-N-I-C-I-N-O-R-I-R-O-N-I-C
[01:51.12]Yeah, I said
[01:52.08]I'm a stand-up comic
[01:54.04]But I always sit and slouch
[01:56.20]And I got my girlfriend pregnant
[01:58.79]On my sterile uncle's pull out couch
[02:04.61]
[02:06.85]I-R-O-N-I-C-I-N-O-R-I-R-O-N-I-C, Ironic
[02:09.41]Yeah
[02:10.76]If everyday you play the board game RISK
[02:12.75]You've probably never taken a risk in your life
[02:16.15]And Monopoly has far from a stranglehold
[02:18.97]On the board game market
[02:21.28]And a little kid died from
[02:22.88]Suffocation
[02:23.54]When he choked on a game piece from
[02:25.34]Operation
[02:26.05]
[02:26.49]And I can't grow a beard
[02:28.06]But that one's not ironic
[02:30.33]That one's just sad
[02:36.73]Bob Barker got all of my pets pregnant
[02:49.75]My grandfather had Alzheimer's
[02:52.51]And one day we were...
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